TP IFC Graduation Ceremony 2010

It has been months since my last update. I didn’t think I would be back here after all this time. But here I am, writing away in a space I originally thought had served its purpose. I suppose, you can say I’m back to writing again. I’ve been meaning to do this for the longest times. I just never went through with it.

Wow.. okay, so where do I even begin? For a start, I’m officially a graduate. A diploma holder, if I may say so.

I know for some of you, it may not matter much. But it means so much to me. I woke up to a beautiful Tuesday morning feeling pumped and excited about the day ahead. I had gotten all my things ready and prepared: camera, graduation robe, my shirt and even my pants. All ironed and crisp-free. All there was left to do was to get dressed, get ready and get there on time.

I don’t even remember feeling tired waking up so early. Maybe a little nervous about going up on stage but that went away just as quick as it came.

I was so excited about meeting my friends again. I can’t tell you how happy I was when I saw them dressed at their best and looking great. The ceremony was, well, for a lack of a better word, lackluster. The only thing I looked forward to was the photo taking. Amidst all that chaos, we all gathered at the ramp and took photos with one another. A remembrance of us, a footprint to show that we were here.

I was breathing in every moment the entire time. Three years seemed to have passed by so fast, it almost didn’t feel real. I remembered stepping in class for the first time feeling afraid and out of place. And look where I am today. I’m holding a diploma in one hand, donning a robe and smiling wide for the camera. All those nights spent in school rushing out a project or a report, all those nights I spent crying because I was afraid I wouldn’t be able to meet the dateline, all those times at lunches and breaks – it was all coming to an end. A beautiful, remarkable and brilliant end

I remembered having to say, “I’m officially a graduate!” out loud to myself before everything around me began to make sense. It feels surreal, even now as I type this entry.

Hiatus

Social media have made me a lazy bloggerr. I’m taking a long break. You can follow me at Twitter, but I’m very selective about who follows.

Alone

It’s raining heavily now, and my heart feels empty. The dress that my mum often wore to wedding events still hangs by the side of the closet, just waiting to be worn and shown off in public once more. She used to tell me that it was her favourite dress out of all that she owned. I couldn’t help but feel a tinge of sadness pressing down its weight on my heart as I desperately try to catch my breath. As I sat down, clutching on to the dress and trying to smell her scent, the tears, which I’ve held back for so long I couldn’t remember, finally tracked down my cheeks.

It’s been more than a year since she passed away. I know it’s probably time for me to find my closure and move on. But sometimes, I feel that the only person who has truly moved on is her. And I am left in the ghosts of memories past, incapable of feeling and experiencing my loss for I have chosen to drown myself in work. It’s only when I’m alone, when the slightest things around the house reminds me of her, that I truly feel my grief manifesting itself into something hideous.

The house is empty and there is not a soul here. I feel alone.

Recap of last week

The term tests finally came to an end. I feel good about my papers but I don’t want to be complacent either about them.

I had my NS medical checkup last Friday. It didn’t take very long as I had expected for it to be. Then again, my appointment was early. The only thing that bothered me was the questionnaire at the end; frankly speaking, it was a complete and utter waste of time.

After my checkup was over, I headed to my friend’s studio where I experimented around with the studio equipments and the off-camera flashes while waiting for the clients to arrive. He had a paid shoot that afternoon and I was there to assist him. The results were good. The clients were happy with the shots he took and had asked him to do another shoot for them again next week.

I left the studio at 4pm that afternoon. I decided I would walk around Bugis for awhile to kill time. Truth be told, I’ve never been a huge fan of Bugis. Sure, you can find cheap things there but rarely do you find something worth to die for. And besides I’ve never been a fan of the crowd either.

After aimlessly circling around Bugis for close to an hour, I then made my way to school for the event shoot. I had been asked the night before to cover the dinner event. At first, I hesitated about going but I ended up accepting the offer eventually. I really enjoyed myself at the dinner event but I wasn’t really happy with one of the photographers.

There’s an unwritten rule a photographer should always follow. Never ever block another photographer’s view by standing directly infront of them and thus rendering him or her unable to capture the shots needed. Personally, I find it rude and distasteful. The general idea is that you should always stand in line with the other photographers. This is especially true at events. There were many times I wanted to speak up and tell him to piss off. Instead, I found myself moving my feet frequently to different locations to get the shots that I needed. At the end of the day, that is all that matters. Everything else is secondary.

More at my Flickr.

And if it’s any consolation at all, I’ve seen much worse at bigger scaled events. Some have resorted to bringing ladders to climb up on as though it’s their god-given right to do so at the risk of causing another photographer far back a shot at taking photos.

Anyway, that’s that. I’m most probably going to Ikea later this afternoon. Not that I have any money to spend or anything but I just wanted to browse the sales item and at the same time, plan out what my dream house should look like. I know it’s too early to even consider my own house but it’s something I hope to achieve before I turn the big thirty. Besides, I have nothing better to do anyway tomorrrow so I might as well.

Prepping for the term tests!

It’s my turn to do the grocery shopping for my dad this week! We’ve run low on a number of things in the fridge. I’ve written them all down on a little yellow post-it and will be making my way to the supermarket once I’m done revising for the term tests at the library later on in the afternoon.

My revision for MCOM yesterday went smoothly. I’ve written pretty much everything I need to know and now it is only a matter of reviewing back what I’ve already written and letting it sink in memory. The only subject this semester that I’m worried about is MMNS. It’s heavy on content and the lecture notes are not organized in key points, and that makes reading it an arduous chore! Coupled with the fact that the teachers are boring and have not a clue on teaching, it’s making me worried.

I’m gonna head out to school now. I’ve about 30 minutes left to make it for the 8am class!